While visiting the somewhat dreary land of Poland, our group, as a whole, experienced conflicting emotions regarding life and death. Traveling to the cute Jewish quarters in Tykocin, and then sharply taking a turn for the worse as we entered the mass graves deep in the forest really helped me to understand how quickly an atmosphere can change. Seeing my friends all around me feeling the same ups and downs that I was gave me a sense of family and safety.
In downtown Tykocin, I saw an adorable little community that really showed me how important Judaism was to the people living there. While walking through the cute square in the center of town, I saw a Beit Kineset and menorahs on almost every corner. I have a pretty solid Jewish community in my town, but we don't have menorahs in our windows. Seeing Judaism being practiced openly in the people's homes really enforces the close feeling of a communal family.
Unfortunately, the history of Tykocin did not stay in favor of the Jewish community. After being in a good mood for the first half of our day, we took a sharp downgrade and traveled to the mass graves deep in the forest near the main part of the town. Hearing the numerous first-hand accounts, and picturing innocent people being treated like animals sent shivers down my spine. During our time there, I took a few moments to myself and wrote in my journal. I reread it after and couldn't believe I had written such angry things:
"I don't understand. I don't understand how someone can be so evil as to mindlessly
murder hundreds of thousands of people. I can't exactly label how I feel. I'm a mixture
of many different emotions, and I'm not even sure what they are. For the first time, I'm
speechless. It sickens me. I have an awful, uncomfortable feeling in my stomach and in
heart. I've decided to light my candle here. To honor those innocent lives that were
tortured to their deaths. I don't know what to say. Trying to comprehend the sight of
mothers running with their children can't even appear in my mind. Everything around
me is gloomy now. It's as if the surroundings match my mood."
I can't imagine how shocking it must be to have your life suddenly change. Having a settlement for hundreds of years, and then having it all taken away from you makes me feel deeply for the people of Tykocin. The question of "why?" is still unanswered to me. I don't think anyone will ever understand the Holocaust, and why people did what they did. I am, without doubt, on the far left end of the spectrum.
No comments:
Post a Comment